Hungover like a Viking, following GABS 2023, the craving for Buffalo Wings is real. Very, very real. But given the hangover, there was no way travel was an option... so off to the Woodlands Hotel for their Buffalo Popcorn Chicken!
Nope, no wings. So they've got no chance. But how will they fare regardless? Only The Rules know the truth!
The Scores
- The Specs: Not wings. Obviously. No getting around this fatal flaw. RATING: 0
- The Sauce: Not Franks, not buffalo. Rinse and repeat... That said, at least this popcorn chicken seemed to be made with some kind of vinegar based hot sauce. RATING: 4
- Crunch: Crunchy! Whether they were battered or floured, I have no actual clue. After GABS, I was lucky to even have my eyes open, and my arms working. RATING: 7
- Serving size & price/Value for Money: 17 bucks for a bowl of popcorn chicken. The Colonel would likely be outraged. But these are better than that. Still, $17 for a handful of chicken bits? Not sure... Lets call it middling. RATING: 5
- Heat/spice level: Pleasant level of heat. I was feeling it by the end, as it should be. Never a struggle but never boring. RATING: 8
- Flavour: Taste buds beaten about by various breweries the night before... and yet, I could taste the Popcorn Chicken here. I liked it. And that weird crunchy garnish was good too! RATING 7
- Celery: Was there Celery sticks? There was! And carrot sticks too! RATING: 5.
- Dipping Sauce: Blue Cheese? Yes Blue Cheese! And some other kind of weird, cream hot sauce. Don't know about that but it is, ultimately, irrelevant! RATING: 5.
- Other Stuff: The Woodlands has been in Coburg FOREVER! Its a local favourite and is, indeed, my local. I like it. Don't love it. The beers are usually a mix of local independents, and there's almost always a decent WCIPA on tap, for your buffalo needs. RATING 6
- Bonus Points: Nope. No bonus points for moist towelette supply.
OVERALL RATING 47/80.
Blindingly good score, really, as these are not wings at all. If the Woodlands applied what they're doing here to wings, they'd likely be top 5 in Melbourne... that is, on my list, and at the time of writing...
Venue Details:
84-88 Sydney Road, Coburg, VIC 3058
Facebook: @thewoodlandscoburg <> Instagram: @thewoodlandscoburg
Website: www.thewoodlands.com.au
